What do you get when you cross Top Gun aviators, KFC budgie smugglers and the Smurfs?
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It’s a wild scenario only plausible in a child’s imagination — unless you’ve been in a Victorian Variety Bash.
Variety Bash, the largest annual fundraiser for Variety – the Children’s Charity Victoria, helps kids that are sick, disadvantaged or have additional needs, by igniting childlike antics in their fundraisers as they convoy across Australia dressed in costume.
This year, the route is Melbourne to Gold Coast, and gearing up for his third time is Kialla local Don Dimstas or, as previous bashes know him, Top Gun.
“We’re team Top Gun, dressed up in the suits and all,” he said.
“We have a bit of a running thing — with velcro ID tags on our suits, we rip them off of whoever stuffs up during the course of the day, doing something a bit weird and stupid, they’re Goose for the day.”
The 1986 classic film could be explained in four words — boys and their toys.
But even Tom Cruise’s head would turn if he saw Mr Dimstas’s 1983 WB Statesman, a machine of its own kind, topped with a shark-like aircraft that truly embodies the movie’s catchphrase, ‘I feel the need, the need for speed’.
Although it has the capacity, Mr Dimstas said it was not an event run in the fast lane.
“It’s not a drive that you think, we’re just going to go to the Gold Coast via the highway. It’s all back roads, majority of it is dirt,” he said.
“There’s roads and towns and pubs that I’ve never heard of, thought of, dreamt about. You get to visit all of these places — it’s pretty right off.
“If you ever get the opportunity and you get to do one, or even do a leg in one, the bug bites you. You want to do this again and again.”
This year, the Top Gun team raised $23,000 through sponsorships, overtaking last year’s personal best of $21,000.
“I don’t want to make it so much about me and the car, these people here (the sponsors displayed on the car’s stickers) are all local businesses and they need the recognition,” he said.
“It doesn’t happen without them and they’re very generous.
“There’s thousands of dollars each sticker and they’re happy to get on board every year — some have even rung and asked when are you going again? We need to organise our sponsorship.”
The sponsors are the wingmen to all bash participants, Top Gun-themed or not, without whom no engines would be starting and no travel stories of Mr Dimstas’s could be told.
“There’s one group that dress up as the Smurfs and, honestly, the people underneath the blue, I wouldn’t know them if I bumped into them,” he said.
“We go to a school every morning. It’s seven in the morning and they’re blue. You’re at the pub at 11 o’clock at night, they’re blue. How?! ... It sure brings some funny stuff out of people.
“It’s a fun time for a great cause ... and you wind up being part of this massive family.
“When you see everyone you think wow, here we go again. Let’s go.”
The 80-odd cars in the 2023 Victorian Variety Bash will drive through Shepparton on Friday evening, August 18, with plans to leave at lunchtime the following day.
Mr Dimstas would like to thank all the Top Gun team’s sponsors: CMV Truck and Bus, VMR Truck Parts, KFC, GV Independant Packers Pty Ltd, John King Signs, Kreskas Bros. Transport, Sherbourne Terrace, Ace Radio, L&P Mackin Forklifts and more.